Hokum

Originally released in May of this year, Hokum just made its streaming debut on Hulu last night.

So of course, it was a movie night at my place.

The film stars Adam Scott as Ohm. No, really. He’s a writer who’s visiting Ireland to scatter his parents’ ashes. And he’s staying in the same whimsical little inn where they stayed on their honeymoon.

For some reason, though, the honeymoon suite is closed. And I mean, really closed. There’s a massive floor-to-ceiling gate over the entry. Ohm asks about this, wondering if his parents stayed there. He’s informed by the bartender, Felicia, that the honeymoon suite has been closed for decades. The story is that the owner of the inn, a creepy old man named Mr. Cob, trapped an evil witch there.

Fiona believes this entirely. So do the other people who work at the inn.

Then, Fiona goes missing. Ohm, worried that the only person he’s been nice to in the country might be in danger, decides to investigate in the one place no one else has bothered to check.

You know, the honeymoon suite.

This was a fun date night horror movie. To start with, the main character was the best sort of asshole. He is rude, and in one case violent, to anyone who starts out telling him how much they love his books. He actually burns the hand of Alby, a writer who hasn’t been published yet, for asking him too many questions at the bar. But the people who talk to him like a person, namely Felicia and a homeless man in the woods named Jerry, meet a much kinder Ohm. If still a little acidic.

Hokum was full of fun little jump scares. You really want to watch the background in this one. It’s one of the reasons why a light horror movie is fun. The little jump. The eerie face, leering from behind the main character. It’s a tiny heart spike. This movie does that very well.

Speaking of good heart spikes, this movie had some good comedy moments. Not laugh-out-loud moments. But chuckle-worthy.

The thing is, when you’re watching a suspenseful film, your funny doesn’t have to be laugh-out-loud funny to elicit an out-loud laugh. Because the film has already set us up for jump scares and tension, moments of comedy work as a pressure release valve. It’s a relief to see something funny. Even if it’s just a goofy face from our main character.

This is why I think it worked well to have Adam Scott as the main character. Most of his roles have been very similar to each other. In both Parks and Rec and Ghosted, he was the straight man reacting to wild characters. In this, he’s the straight man reacting to dead bodies and eerie ghosts. Turns out, he does both well.

Finally, I do want to talk about my favorite part of the movie. I need to be careful, though, because I don’t want to spoil it.

Though, you probably already know this.

Through the start of the film, everyone’s quick to tell Ohm stories about the witch. It should surprise no one that it’s not the witch you really need to fear. It’s the men who tell you to fear them.

Isn’t that always the way?

All that being said, this wasn’t a perfect film. My first complaint is something that I know a lot of horror writers struggle with. It’s a struggle that writers from previous generations haven’t had to deal with. But we do, so we should.

The whole premise of the movie, being trapped in the honeymoon suite, would have been cleared up real fast if Ohm had a fucking cell phone. No one in this whole movie has a phone. We actually see people talking on landlines with actual cords. This movie is set in present day. It’s unrealistic for no one to have a phone.

It would have taken thirty seconds for Ohm to try to make a call near the start of the film, and have someone explain to him that reception is shit at the hotel.

Sorry, it’s Ireland. Reception is shite.

What, you’re running around in the dark? Where’s your phone with a flashlight built in? Can’t you find Felicia? Didn’t she have her phone with her? Your co-investigator is outside and doesn’t know you’re trapped? Fucking call his cell phone!

I also feel like, since we started the movie talking about this crack Halloween party at the hotel, there could have been some more Halloween elements. Granted, we did have the adorable turnip lanterns. Those were quite fun and Irish. But then the story picks up again halfway through November. It just feels like a missed opportunity. We’re in Ireland. It’s Halloween. Do something with it.

The biggest sin of the movie, though, was that it was rather predictable. With one exception (and you’ll know it when you see it) you can see the plot twists coming. It’s not challenging. It asks nothing of the audience, rather spoon-feeding the tale to us with big old spoonfuls of predictability. Art should take risks, horror most of all. Hokum does not.

All that being said, this was a fun movie. It’s probably not making it onto my top ten list anytime soon. But if you want a cozy, fun Halloween movie that you can watch with friends, this might just be it.

Need more movie reviews? Check out my favorite Creepy Horror Movies for Kids.

My book, Station 86 Volume One, is available now on Amazon! It’s got two dark sci-fi stories about murder and mayhem on the station of First Contact.